So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize