bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize