IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
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It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
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This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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