we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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