He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
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