Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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