this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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