On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
