I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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