I didn't shave. On purpose
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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