I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
