Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
