I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
operation harelip BJ is a go
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
