you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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