doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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