So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
