i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
