Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
