Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
