im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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