Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
