No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
