Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
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