i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
