aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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