So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
