I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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