no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
