hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
