love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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