What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Randomize
