That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Everything about him screamed your future.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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