Just fell off a train. Bad.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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