yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
