do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
