Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
