After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize