you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
