Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize