the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
