hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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