I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize
