Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
