i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
