i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
