I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Randomize
