Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
You smell like stripper and shame
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
