I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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