don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
So vagazzling was a success
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Randomize
