We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
