Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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